Dion's random ramblings

Wednesday, July 05, 2006

A time to put it to the test....

Have you ever prayed and asked God to give you patience to deal with a person or a situation?
 
I don't know about you, but I have come to discover that I seldom want patience when I pray for it... What do I mean by that? Well, I have come to discover that most often I want something akin to 'spiritual asprin'! Have you ever read the description on a box of asprin? It promises to offer "fast, temporary relief from pain and suffering". Sound familiar?
 
When I pray for patience, or grace, to deal with difficult people or situations I am most often asking God for two things. Firstly, I am looking for "fast, temporary, relief from frustratiion and pain". It's not what I need! But, sadly it's what I most often ask for. Secondly, rather than asking God to change me, to help me to grow, I most often want God to do something to someone else. 'Lord please convict.... of his sin", "Lord, please help .... to see the error of his ways", " Lord, please show ... how wrong she is and how right I am". Does this sound familiar?
 
Over the last few months I have been praying that God would give me patience to deal with many things. In particular I have been praying that I will have patience and courage to do the right things in my ministry, and particularly that I will have patience to deal with the leaders of our denomination in a Christlike, loving and patient manner.
 
Thankfully, God is wise enough to hear my prayer and give me what I need in order for me to grow, not what I ask for in order for others to change. Today I received a patience testng email from a from a Church leader who often frustrates me. When I first read it it brought about those old feelings of anger, resentment and discouragement. But, then I realised that this email was God's gracious answer to my prayer for patience! I need to grow, I need to learn to live with difficult people and challenging situations.
 
If I cannot learn to manage my emotions, feelings, and reactions, then I will never receive an answer to my prayer for patience and grace. It is so easy to be pulled into 'smallness', to forget what truly matters! So, please pray for me. Please pray for me! Please pray that I will have the courage and wisdom to truly receive the patience growing situations that I have been praying for (without knowing it).
 
The sad thing that I realise is that very few people can be trusted with their success. I want to grow in grace, patience, and love. I want to be worthy of the privelage that God has blessed me with!

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